Terd of Tilly Birds, or Terd Anuroj Kateleka, widely known as the lead vocalist of Tilly Birds with many hit songs and fans nationwide, posted a message commemorating the 5th anniversary of his family's passing last year in 2020. He admitted it was an extremely painful time and explained the reason after some criticized him for “using his parents' deaths to write songs for profit.”Tags: [music, Tilly Birds, family loss, grief, controversy]
“Maybe it’s just me who feels that the numbers 5 or 10 seem especially fitting for the word ‘anniversary,’ so I wanted to write a note. This year marks the 5th anniversary since my family passed away.”Tags: [anniversary, remembrance, family, reflection]
In 2020: Gucci (dog) 28 Mar 2020, mother 3 Jun 2020, father 28 Dec 2020. Not a day goes by without thinking of them.Tags: [dates, loss, family, pets]
The age 25, the 'benjapes' year, might be the reason everything happened—I don’t know. But what I do know is I understand almost everyone, every character in the story, who has lost an important family member how painful it is. One day after losing my father at the end of the year, I wrote, “This year is the worst year of my life.” They never failed to give me love and warmth. I miss the times when Dad teased Mom and Mom teased Dad, funny like a sitcom—we laughed, were happy. They showed me that people who’ve loved each other for 30 years, despite some rough patches, truly love each other in the end. That’s why I still believe in love stubbornly because I probably won’t love anyone as much as Dad loved Mom.”Tags: [grief, love, family, memory, reflection]
Before Dad passed, he told me, “Terd, you’re skilled now. You can live without me.” Five years have passed, and yes, I’m living (still alive, haha). What Dad and Mom gave me with unconditional love, I’ve tried doing myself. It’s tiring, but I discovered I like cleaning and organizing. But I can’t get through every storm alone because if Batman can’t do without Alfred, or Harry without Ron and Hermione, likewise, I can’t do without Tilly Birds, friends, siblings, and the remaining Kateleka family members.”Tags: [family support, resilience, friendship, grief]
Life is still kind to me by keeping these people around to remind me when I’m overwhelmed or mentally disturbed, no matter the cause. They help pull me back to reality. Thank you all and sorry if I ever caused discomfort through words or actions. Thanks to everyone who makes me want to be a better person every day.Tags: [gratitude, mental health, support, apology]
Finally, I want to apologize to anyone who has felt displeased or uncomfortable with me often speaking about Dad and Mom. I reflected deeply and asked myself why. The only answer is I don’t want them to disappear from memory.Tags: [apology, memory, family, reflection]
Someone once accused me of “riding on my parents’ deaths to write songs and make money.” That hurt deeply, but I never intended that. I don’t know how to make everyone believe me because I truly wrote for them—and in a way, for myself. When I need to vent heavy feelings, putting them into song lyrics helps heal and clear my heart.Tags: [criticism, songwriting, emotional therapy, grief]
The first song I wrote was after Billy made a demo. I used my feelings to write (Heart In A Cage) to express what words alone couldn’t. The song had to speak for me and helped heal my feelings. “If We Meet Again (Until Then)” is one of those songs. I got the lyrics while meditating at my father’s cremation (I had to wake early and couldn’t sleep). I closed my eyes, recalled the melody Milo wrote for the song without words, and began inserting lyrics in my head until the verse was complete.Tags: [songwriting, grief, healing, music]
Thank you all for reading. In another 5 years, I’ll write again. Happy New Year.Tags: [gratitude, future, writing, New Year]
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