The WandOland program invites us to open a conversation about the 40-plus years of marriage of Tak Mayura and Nui Thada through questions that explore their memories and how these two people have adapted over their long life together—from learning to accept each other's strengths and weaknesses, acknowledging past issues with women, but choosing to stay because the good outweighs the bad; viewing lasting love not as perfection but as focusing enough on each other's goodness to move forward; and finally, what keeps them choosing to be by each other's side.
Usually, what routines do you and Nui do together?
Nui Thada: We eat out and play golf.
Tak Mayura: I've been playing golf for almost 20 years. Actually, in a marriage, having activities to do together is very important.
What do you usually talk about?
Nui Thada: Mostly work-related things. We both have inspiration and enjoy developing youth. I've been involved in education for over 10 years, especially scholarships. We mostly talk about these topics.
Woody: One unresolved issue is always bringing work into conversations.
Oat: Sometimes we agree not to talk about work on trips, but it only lasts a little while.
Woody: We even bring work to the dining table with our grandchildren and mother. She asks if we want to schedule a meeting. Work conversations mix into family talks. Sometimes for 15 minutes, we lose balance.
Nui Thada: There's a term called 'Quality time,' meaning moments when someone longs to see us, like our mother who has less time. If we want to talk about work but have little time, we mix it into conversations and lifestyle. That's my advice. We respect each other's space and individuality, but balancing this requires skill.
Oat: I feel sometimes we do separate activities but when together, we quickly turn to our phones.
Nui Thada: Nobody likes it when you're talking and then someone looks at their phone and talks again. At that moment, you're the most important person in the world. Everyone wants what we call quality time.
Tak Mayura: About enduring and staying together, I say marriage is hard. We've been together over 40 years but it feels recent. I believe it depends on both people being good. If I do my best but the other person doesn't, it won't work. When I married, I never thought if it gets bad, I'll just change partners. People today do that—they break up and find someone new, but that's not possible. After marriage, you have to get through this. Nui isn't perfect, nor am I, but we find ways to live together.
What do you mean by 'good' exactly?
Tak Mayura: In 40 years, we've gone through a lot. Men sometimes have small issues or women problems. I weigh these carefully. It annoys me; it's normal because he works and sometimes drinks, so there might be women. Nowadays, some men don't support just one woman—I call those people foolish, having affairs. When these happen, I always weigh it. Am I angry? Yes. But I consider if his good outweighs the bad. If so, I choose the good. If not and problems continue, then I leave. But we've always gotten through because his good outweighs the bad. What kind of good? Good enough for love. You have to be good first before love. I always think women are born to be cared for; I call my wife the head of the household.
If young people ask why should they endure?
Tak Mayura: I think it's a generational thing. I've used the same phone for 4 years because it still works. But Nui has goodness, and I love him. I told him not to leave me; no one else would take me (laughs). So I'll hang on to him for life.
Nui Thada: I think it's about compatibility. Accepting each other's strengths and weaknesses, even if not liked at first, becomes a habit and creates new value together. That's the pride of married life, whether legally recognized or not. Young people will learn that patience and endurance have value.
Tak Mayura: But Nui has lots of patience. Sometimes he doesn't like me but tries to adjust and accept because he doesn't want to change. Do you want to change?
Nui Thada: No (laughs). I adjust but don't change.
. Click to readEntertainment newsMore