Behind many hit songs, the image of a smile and brightness is actually filled with unseen pressure. Ice Sarunyu He admitted on the program "Let's Talk" about his emotional wounds, saying in 20 years in the industry he never felt good enough despite nationwide hit songs. He accepted that no one stays famous forever and now has grown mentally, choosing to balance his life anew.
Looking back to childhood, why did you dream of becoming a singer?
Ice Sarunyu: I've liked music since I was a child and don't remember other dreams clearly. The clearest was wanting to be a singer. As I grew older, I realized I had to face reality and began wanting to be a flight attendant or a pilot because I felt it would take me abroad to a wider world. But singing remained my sole, core dream. When teachers asked us as kids what we wanted to be, friends gave various answers, but I always said I wanted to be a singer because I loved singing.
At what age did you start liking to sing?
Ice Sarunyu: I remember in second grade, I went to the front of the classroom to sing, though it's a vague memory, the deepest I recall. I sang "Milk Fee" since second grade and always volunteered for activities like flagpole ceremonies, in front of the class or school, Christmas events, and Sunthorn Phu Day, always offering to sing.
Looking back to when you were a child singing in that setting, what did it give you?
Ice Sarunyu: It gave me every kind of emotion. I recall even when sad or punished by my father, songs would pop into my head—sometimes sad, sometimes fun, various categories. My grandmother liked traditional Thai songs, my uncle listened to country music, and my parents liked songs like "Yesterday Once More," so I grew up hearing diverse music.
How did the image of being an artist as a child compare to actually becoming one?
Ice Sarunyu: There are similarities and differences. Similar because as a child, I remembered artists standing on stage entertaining people, making them sing, dance, and raise their hands. But as kids, we didn't see the pressures, expectations, or demands behind the profession. Those aspects are different and unexpected. The similarity is that I did see myself on stage entertaining, just as I wanted.
You didn't anticipate pressures 1, 2, 3; what was it really like on the job?
Ice Sarunyu: Being in this industry isn’t just about me. There are expectations. We stand on the foundation of entertaining and bringing happiness to people, fans, and others. But behind the scenes, creating one piece takes work, and whether it succeeds depends on many expectations—from others, from myself. Sometimes things don’t go as planned, like technical issues on air or restrictions on distribution. Sometimes a previous work was successful, but a new one isn’t as much. There are times I have to be strong and times I feel fragile. Sometimes just someone asking what I’m doing since I disappeared makes me feel fragile, even though I’ve been working continuously. Does that mean I’m not successful? Sometimes people don’t notice because my focus isn’t there.
What is your perspective on being an artist?
Ice Sarunyu: The day we succeed, it’s very hard to get there. But the day we succeed, maintaining that position is even harder. I believe no one stays a superstar forever; no one is successful forever. Even though I remind myself of this constantly, when failure really happens, no one can feel totally okay and unaffected. You have to feel something, but then manage and stay mindful.
You seem very present with yourself. Are you happy to share this side?
Ice Sarunyu: Really? I think I’m someone who smiles and enjoys life, but actually, I put a lot of pressure on myself.
When the whole country, your fans everywhere, were at that point, how did you feel?
Ice Sarunyu: Looking back, it was gradual, not sudden. At the time, it felt like a slow seep. Now, the image seems huge. At that moment, it was the first hit song "Kon Man Rak" (The One Who Loves), when I was 19, still taking a boat from Wat Sri Boonruang pier to study at Srinakharinwirot University. Even when famous, I still did that until it became impossible to walk the streets at "Judjada" because people kept asking for photos and greetings.
How did you feel then?
Ice Sarunyu: "Kon Man Rak" led to "Kon Jai Ngai" (The Tenderhearted) for nearly two years, so I had time to absorb it all. It really changed my life. "Kon Jai Ngai" made me realize I couldn’t live the same normal life because I got more attention than usual, causing disruption in that area. Celebrities then had to live in a somewhat limited space. It was strange and unexpected, even though I wanted to be a singer since childhood, my expectations weren't that big.
On the day you realized you could no longer do what you used to do everywhere, how did you feel?
Ice Sarunyu: I was happy, but I also felt some things had to change. For example, I loved eating famous street noodles, but then suddenly, it wasn't the internet era where people saw us constantly. When they saw me, they wanted to take pictures every time, even when I was about to eat. They had their reasons, and I understood—they had other errands—but when they saw me, they wanted a photo. Nowadays, people see celebrities all the time on social media, so it's normal. Back then, people wanted to touch or be closer. It was joyful, but the entertainment career requires trade-offs. You gain love and admiration but lose some privacy.
When so many fans poured in, did you ever get carried away by your fame?
Ice Sarunyu: I didn’t get carried away by fame because I stayed close to my family, my parents, who kept me grounded. But I wouldn’t say I didn’t get carried away by the attention. When you become well-known or successful, people around you want to do their best for you. But sometimes that care becomes indulgence.
When indulged too much, people get used to it and lose perspective. It can spoil someone. There are two outcomes: either they get completely spoiled and it’s hard to pull themselves back, affecting their emotions and life, or they have someone who keeps them grounded.
I’m very lucky to have close university friends who grew up with me before I entered entertainment and stayed with me through my success. Our words carry influence—sometimes unknowingly—and we demand much from those around us to make our words succeed. It’s a tough dynamic. I’m not carried away by fame but am accustomed to being pampered.
After 20 years in the industry, do you have true friends or trusted people in it?
Ice Sarunyu: I haven’t fully opened my heart to trust anyone completely in the industry—not because they’re bad, but because I mostly have work friendships. I have many work friends. People think I’m very close with Peck and Off, and we talk often, but mostly about work. The really close friends are from university—about 4-5 people. We chat daily about everything, from silly stuff to economics, society, pageants. They constantly remind and support me. I have few but very close friends with whom I share everything.
Most see Ice Sarunyu as the 'Prince of Smile.' Are you really like that or is it different?
Ice Sarunyu: It’s true but not completely. I am cheerful and smile at everyone because I want to share good energy with those I meet, talk to, and spend time with. But the other side is very serious—I’m focused on work and life with clear goals. My seriousness is what helps me succeed.
So, there are two sides: the cheerful one spreading happiness, and the serious one focused on goals. Have you heard the phrase 'smiling to the world but crying alone'? That was true before—I used to give away all my happiness to make others happy but felt drained at home. Now, I’m more honest with myself. I don’t want to cause others suffering, but I also don’t give so much as before. I've grown and become calmer.
Is there a past event that still hurts, something you wish you could go back and fix?
Ice Sarunyu: I wish I had been kinder to myself in many things. I used to pressure myself a lot in every step of life and work, always aiming for success but being very harsh, never comforting myself with 'You’re good,' 'It’s okay,' or 'You succeeded.' That was rare in the past.
Looking back at songs like "Yark Don Pen Jao Kong," "Pae Lae Pan," or "Naruk Kuen," which people now say were hits, I never told myself those songs were successful. I felt they didn’t match "Kon Man Rak" or "Kon Jai Ngai." I thought, 'It has to be more.' I didn’t feel grateful or proud of those achievements.
I am thankful to everyone who worked with me; they gave their all. I always say thank you to the team who worked hard to make everything happen. I couldn’t do it alone. But I always blamed myself, wondering if it was me who wasn’t enough to make the work go further. I felt harsh toward myself.
Looking back 16-17 years ago, seeing the young version of yourself sitting in front of you now, do you want to apologize to him?
Ice Sarunyu: Actually, I did my best. It’s a function beyond my control. If I ask myself, I’d say I did my best, I was good. Sometimes factors aren’t just about me. But regarding effort, there’s no point where I didn’t try. I love him, I’m proud of myself. Not everything succeeds perfectly.
How is your heart now? Has your view of love changed from the past to present?
Ice Sarunyu: It has changed, but that shift happened almost 10 years ago. I used to feel love was very private, something I couldn’t speak about. That person had to be kept in a dark corner. Now, I live a normal life, have good love sometimes, bad sometimes, but mostly good. He cares for my heart well, and we care for each other, giving space to one another. We live normally. He doesn’t want to be a public figure or be identified as my partner in society, but he has a place with me, my family, friends. He exists but does not want to be in the spotlight.
What kind of love allows you to be your true self?
Ice Sarunyu: Love that supports and reminds each other. I like the song "Wind Beneath My Wings." Love is like that wind under our wings—ready to lift us up, embrace us, and when we must land, help us land softly. We can’t fly higher forever; one day we must land. So the wind beneath my wings supports us, making the landing as gentle as possible. That’s the kind of love that cares for each other.
Do you feel you are now the best version of yourself?
Ice Sarunyu: Almost. I don’t dare say the very best because I still have expectations to do better. I have mechanisms to comfort myself, but I expect improvement. Is this the best? It is, but there may be a higher level of best. Right now, in my mind, regarding success and people around me, things are generally good.
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