“Ann Alisha” Today accompanied by her daughters “Richa and Lisa” She opens up about the decision to transfer her daughters’ schools, facing strong resentment from them over perceived favoritism. She shares her severe menopause symptoms causing intense outbursts at home and fears of Alzheimer's, on the "Kuy Zap Show" program on One31 channel.
Has someone appeared on the show before?
Ann: Richa has already earned money from Aunt Ning by doing massages as a side job. Aunt Ning gave a lot, like a big bundle. After that, she kept on massaging nonstop.
How old?
Richa: 10 years old.
Lisa: 6 years old.
Why did the two girls just change schools?
Ann: It's the parents' responsibility to look after the education system. Some systems don’t fit them. When we chose their school before, we thought IB was learning through play. Our family travels a lot and learns from experiences. We thought that suited them. But as they grew, we wanted to offer more, so we tried a more rigorous academic school, focusing deeper on subjects. Since they like music, drawing, and sports, we found a school that better suits those interests.
How was the school transfer?
Lisa: Good, because here we get to eat delicious sandwiches which the old school didn’t provide; here they give sandwiches every day.
Richa: The new school is good. They have ice cream.
Ann: Do you like it? How are the teachers?
Richa: The teachers are nice.
When you found out about moving schools, did you want to go?
Richa: I didn’t like it and was angry at Mom because my friends were at the old school.
Ann: They’re at an age where they form close friend groups, growing up together since kindergarten, so many attachments. Deciding was hard. I’ve moved schools twice before and know how tough it is, like being separated. Lisa wasn’t too worried since she’s younger. We took them to see options and didn’t just order them to move. We let them test and see if they liked anything at the new school.
But during this school transfer, someone cried a lot?
Ann: That was me (laughs). It was funny. We had built a community over eight years. As moms, we met daily, handled school issues together, had strong bonds. On the last day at that school, we had our usual lunch table and cried because we wouldn’t meet again. At 47, I wondered how I’d make new friends. The kids had no problems.
Richa: I had fun because it was the last day of school.
Ann: But I hugged the teachers and cried, saying I wouldn’t come back here anymore.
After moving to the new school, did you return to the old one?
Ann: Yes. At 47, almost 50, making new friends isn’t easy. I felt attached to the mom friends. Every Friday we’d meet to play tennis or have meals, making a weekly tradition. It was a real bond.
Usually new students carry nice backpacks walking into school, but someone refused to walk and had to use a wheelchair and a cast. What happened?
Richa: It was a friend’s birthday, and I twisted my ankle.
Ann: It started Monday, the first day, so she was in a wheelchair all week.
The two girls have very different personalities. Who is neater?
Ann: Richa is neat and listens when told not to touch things. Lisa is more like, “Don’t touch yet, is this it, Mom?” They are opposites but both have a playful sense of humor and like teasing each other.
Living together, they must fight?
Ann: With kids 3-4 years apart, will they love each other when they grow? I wonder. Being the same gender, they want to be alike and compete. Richa is entering puberty and wants privacy and space, but Lisa adores her sister and wants to follow everywhere. Richa gets annoyed wanting space, but Lisa doesn’t understand.
Has Richa started caring about appearance?
Ann: Last birthday, she said she didn’t want toys but something else.
Richa: I wanted makeup.
Ann: She wanted long nails and hair done for the break. She likes beauty stuff. Lisa also styles her hair and puts on blush but we have to persuade her; she goes to school messy and rough.
Do the kids have phones? Are they allowed to use them?
Richa: When I went to Mongolia, Mom let me use one, but back home, Mom limits my usage.
Have you asked why?
Richa: (shakes head) Why?
Ann: I think it’s basic. We measure by our own standard. Back then, kids got phones in high school. But now things move faster socially. Still, she doesn’t really need it because I drive her everywhere daily. The Mongolia trip was during school break; Dad rode a motorcycle from Watcharaphon to Russia and wanted her to experience riding with him. She flew to meet Dad in China, then he rode his motorcycle to pick her up. She was in Mongolia for over 10 days. I had to stay reachable, so she had a phone and a group chat.
How do you feel as a mother letting your daughter ride a motorcycle 10 days from China to Mongolia?
Ann: Richa is a traveler by profession, so she’s used to trips from a young age. This time, Dad said it was his dream to have his daughter ride with him once. Mongolia’s roads are mostly open plains, not highways. He was fully equipped with microphone communication with her. They agreed that if she wanted to get off, she’d tap him.
Richa: If sleepy, tell Dad.
Ann: They drove 300-400 km daily. A service car followed. They agreed if sleepy, she’d tap Dad so she wouldn’t fall off.
Was it fun riding a motorcycle 10 days?
Richa: (nods) When we stopped and saw sheep without water, we helped pump water for them. It was cute. I saw baby sheep and did everything. I’m good. It was a Mongolian resting place. We had to enter from the left but step with the right foot first.
Ann: That’s their tradition when offering or picking things up (shows hand gesture). We’re lucky Dad travels a lot, so our kids gain much from experiencing different cultures unlike at home.
Were you worried?
Ann: Of course. On that trip, I fought with Richa. I told her it was too much. We argued about the motorcycle from day one until now; the house is full of motorcycles. I couldn’t resist anymore. She said this is her profession and main income. I worry but have to trust her judgment about safety. It’s a great experience for the kids. She wanted all three kids to go, but it was too difficult, so I said no, we want comfort and clean bathrooms.
Richa: When I woke up tired, I heard them talking to Uncle James about a giant spider pulling me while I was sleeping. I woke up scared. I saw it was huge. If Mom went, she wouldn’t have fun. We had to wake up early to eat bad food. We changed beds every day. Mom doesn’t like changing beds often.
Lisa is very much like her dad. How so?
Ann: Do you like fast rides when Dad drives the motorcycle fast?
Lisa: (thumbs up)
Ann: This one loves it and is as mischievous as Dad.
The two kids have very different spending habits?
Ann: Previously, Richa was frugal and thoughtful about money, maybe like me. Lisa spends whatever she has immediately, just like Richa’s dad (laughs). When Squishies were popular, I gave each 1,000 baht budget. Richa would consider prices carefully and buy just one item, while Lisa bought everything in the first store, spending all 1,000 baht.
Richa: I spend slowly. If I don’t want something, I save money to buy later.
Ann: Lisa is generous like her dad, spends everything in one day. I told her dad about it, and he said if we make a will, Richa should be the guardian (laughs) because Lisa would blow it all.
How do you teach them about money?
Ann: Slowly. They don’t really understand the value of money yet. They don’t get pocket money like we did at school. We try to improve gradually. I told them this money can buy three items, so learn to adjust and save. Lisa is generous and often opens her piggy bank, but kids nowadays don’t carry cash; they have bank cards and get money on birthdays. Lisa often says, “Mom, take my money,” or “Nanny, take it.” She likes sharing for milk or things at home. Richa is clear about when to return money. Lisa is a generous spender who loves to give to friends.
Sometimes Richa feels you favor Lisa?
Ann: As the eldest, does Pan ever feel hurt or think Mom is biased?
Pancake: Yes (laughs). Why does Mom blame me but spoil the younger one?
Richa: Yeah, it’s not fair.
Pancake: I understand (laughs).
Ann: Because she’s the eldest, I think she understands more. She’s easygoing and listens. But Lisa requires more strategy to manage. Sometimes it’s tense, so I ask if she can give in first to keep peace. But sometimes I forget she’s still young. Being older means sacrifice, but that’s not in our house. One day they fought, and after getting in the car, Lisa wanted to stay home. I said she had no choice and had to spend the day with me. She got mad and wouldn’t speak to me, so I took her phone and told her if she didn’t want to talk, she could type to me 10 things she liked, 10 things she disliked, and 10 things she hated. Later she typed and the first was about unfairness between her and her sister, why Mom favors the younger one. It’s hard but we adjust slowly. Honestly, it’s tough with menopause and preteen kids. Hormones are scary. I had to manage myself first and ask if I’m really unfair and what to do.
Richa: True.
Where do you want Mom to change?
Richa: It’s okay.
Lisa wants to tell Mom something?
Lisa: I want Mom to sell more products.
Ann: (laughs approvingly) I do live sales these days (laughs).
I heard the rule in Ann’s house is to have a Deep Talk with the kids every night before bed?
Ann: Yes. We feel that after school, we don’t get much from them. They are tired and processing a lot in their heads. They don’t want to talk about their day. But before bed, they open up. We go to bed early—7:30 pm upstairs, lights out, 10 hours sleep. Before, it was stressful. Now it’s close time where we learn secrets, feelings, and what’s happening. We share three things each night: something we liked, something we didn’t, and something we want to do. This way, we understand each other.
At 47, you started menopause?
Ann: Since last year. It was scary. Ask these two how my hormones were. Tell them.
Richa: Angry, complaining, hot, angry.
Ann: (laughs) That’s it. I didn’t expect it. I thought menopause was for older people, like 60. Because I had kids through IVF and hormone injections, maybe genetically, menopause came earlier.
At first, I didn’t realize. There was a period when I didn’t want to leave the house, didn’t want to dress up or meet friends. I just sat on the sofa, didn’t want to do anything except take kids to and from school every morning. I’d get irritated easily. Sometimes when chewing, I’d get annoyed. Sometimes at night, I felt bugs crawling and vacuumed the bed daily thinking it was dust mites. Once while driving on the highway, I forgot where I was going. It was terrifying. I turned left and asked myself, "What’s wrong with me?"
Richa said Mom was crazy. Everyone said Mom was crazy, including Dad and my husband. I realized I wasn’t normal. Then I had hot flashes and sweated even in air conditioning and couldn’t bear it. I thought for sure, so I went to the doctor to check hormones.
Turns out my hormones were zero. Female hormones completely gone. That’s why I had all the symptoms. The doctor said it came early but nowadays many people this age have it.
Driving and forgetting where you were going, was it like blacking out?
Ann: Not blacking out, but I forgot who I was supposed to meet or where to go. I’d see Pancake’s face and know her but couldn’t remember her name quickly. I thought I had Alzheimer’s and got checked for months. Result: menopause. Now it’s better. Everything requires consultation. I could just let it be, but if I want happiness with my kids and family, I need to manage it. Now I’m happier.
You take care of your health now. I heard you do Hyrox and don’t miss days, going two days in a row?
Ann: Since Lisa was born, I didn’t exercise for six years, just sitting. Then I met P'Mae who invited me to Hyrox. It’s good. From not leaving the house to running 5-6 km daily at 5 a.m. in Lumpini Park. I push myself and train to be strong. It’s not just about looking good but being strong. I had kids late and want to age with quality.
How is the sweetness with P’Rik? Still flirt?
Ann: I tell him to go far away (laughs). Actually, if you look at us over 20 years, we started as friends with a masculine side. I’m not a sweet, soft woman but loud and tough. We don’t show much affection but understand each other well and don’t nag. Sometimes it gets a bit rough, you know?
Do you try to show love when the kids are around? How are they?
Ann: I see my toughness in the kids. I see families hugging affectionately and think how cute that is, so I try to show them. Since P’Rik isn’t home much, when Dad wants a hug, Mom has to lead. I hold hands walking in malls, and the girls look at me like, “What is this?” It’s unfamiliar. They intervene and ask what I’m doing.
When parents are sweet to each other, how do the kids react?
Ann: When Richa was younger and fought over Dad, I said, “He’s my boyfriend.” She said no and hugged Dad away from me.
Will the kids enter the entertainment industry like their parents?
Ann: It’s up to them. Honestly, I give them freedom of thought. If you ask me, I don’t want it because I know it’s hard. There are easier ways to earn now. But it depends on them.
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