We all tend to have “someone” who causes headaches, fatigue, or drains our energy—whether through exhausting phone calls, tense dinners, or meetings that just thinking about makes us sigh—turning what should be a simple life into a complicated struggle.
We might comfort ourselves thinking these people only upset us temporarily, but shocking new research published in the global journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences (PNAS) in 2026, funded by the U.S. National Institute on Aging, reveals that such toxic relationships don’t just annoy us—they actually accelerate cellular aging (Accelerated Biological Aging).
Those who harm us aren’t necessarily bitter enemies but often close individuals orbiting our daily lives, defined in the study as “Hasslers.”
A Hassler is someone who constantly creates problems, complicates life, or keeps us under stress. Nearly 30% of people have at least one Hassler in their surroundings.
What makes Hasslers dangerous isn’t a single severe clash but the daily “water dripping on stone” effect that erodes both physical and mental health, as social relationships are fundamental indicators of human health.
Researchers from New York University and Indiana University, led by Byungkyu Lee, studied 2,345 participants, measuring not facial wrinkles but epigenetic clocks through saliva to detect DNA methylation changes—one of the most precise indicators of biological age—with startling results.
Each additional Hassler in one’s life accelerates aging by 1.5%, equating to adding about nine months to one’s biological age per Hassler.
Toxic relationships accumulate as chronic stress, causing harm comparable to discrimination, unemployment, and financial problems. Continuous stress hormone release leads to chronic inflammation, weakened immunity, higher BMI, and increased risk of heart disease and other illnesses.
The research also found women tend to perceive others’ problems more quickly, absorb those feelings, and carry the stress themselves, making them more vulnerable to harm from Hasslers.
Family Hasslers—especially parents and children—have an even stronger aging impact than outsiders, since while we can avoid annoying acquaintances, it’s nearly impossible to avoid family members.
Outsider Hasslers often appear as neighbors or coworkers, where obligations and shared spaces make these relationships more constrained than chosen friendships.
Though the aging effect may seem small initially, it accumulates over time. Allowing these people to linger in our lives too long is like making incremental payments toward deteriorating our health.
Since we can’t always cut ties or quit jobs immediately, appropriate coping strategies are the best solution.
Setting firm boundaries is key: once we recognize who harms our health, we should reduce time spent with them, minimize efforts to invest in such relationships, and prioritize self-care before and after encounters to relieve stress.
Emotional distancing is also effective—learning not to absorb their emotions or problems, stopping efforts to change unchangeable habits, and instead altering how we respond to them.
Additionally, cultivating positive relationships helps balance the inevitable social turmoil, providing emotional healing and slowing aging.
Ultimately, stress isn’t only about work or money; it often stems from social circles. When someone constantly drains our energy, choosing to reduce their role, maintain proper distance, and prevent their emotional influence isn’t selfish—it’s a scientifically supported method to slow aging.
ReferencesVice,PNAS,Washington Post
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